Facebook Tip: Don’t Act Stuck Up, We’re Not Impressed

Don't Act Stuck UpMy clients often ask me what they should do to further their reach and social media effectiveness.  When they ask me that I know that they are expecting ideas such as techniques and tips, insider knowledge of little known Facebook tricks or Pinterest hacks, but at the end of the day it all comes down to this:

Make a friend by being a friend first and business will follow.

Let me tell you a little story.  I was introduced to someone online –  a “marketing and branding genius.”  I want to learn and grow and be influenced by others, especially anyone who is thought of well.  I like to hang out with people that make things happen so I was really looking forward to getting to know this new friend.  But over the weekend this person announced on Facebook that they were cleaning out their “friends” list to eliminate those they did not know or didn’t feel would benefit them.  They stated that they only wanted “quality” connections.  They proclaimed that the next day was the day that we would find out if we made the cut.  Seriously, sister?

I’m glad I didn’t know this person and hadn’t invested a lot in a friendship.  I mean, think about it, if you have been receiving emails from this person and you’ve spent years following their every move, purchasing their books, products and systems and then suddenly they’ve declared that only “the worthy”  will remain their “friend” how would you feel?  I would have felt humiliated, cheap and unappreciated.

As we grow in our influence it becomes impossible to have a personal relationship with everyone that we influence, I get that.  I also understand the desire to have a very personal account on Facebook and move those business contacts to a public page.  But to announce it as she did without giving her followers an alternative to go to such as a Facebook business page to connect with her going forward is simply stupid and not marketing.

Marketing and sales is all about relationships and making people feel unworthy or excluded will cause them to exclude themselves from your next sale.

I want to contrast this with an experience I had in the same week with someone whom I have admired and learned from for years.   He is a world-wide influencer in all things technology and business and in my estimation second only to Steve Jobs.  I was given the opportunity to meet this person one-on-one and ask him any business questions I wanted.  He is a huge name in the Internet Marketing world and meeting him one-on-one is an honor that I still can’t get over.  I tried not to scream and gush like a tween at a Justin Bieber concert and somehow only managed to seem slightly coherent though star-struck.  But he was the gentlest, kindest and most sincerely giving person I have ever met.  He even thanked me (little ol’ me) for my patronage and involvement in his business courses.

Which one do you think is a better sales person?

Which one do you think makes more money?

Which one do you think actually has a loyal following, a tribe, a movement.

I even tweeted to him after our skype to thank him and he tweeted back.  I am still star struck and even more so now than before

What an irony that is, he just acted like a normal regular guy and that made me admire him even more.

The contrast between these two individuals was amazing and has confirmed a lesson my Grandfather taught me a long, long time ago:  in life really “big” people have nothing to prove and are very humble and grateful.

If you are reading this blog you are an influencer, right now.  If you are here it means that  you are striving in your business or career and someone is watching you and learning from you ,today. You see most people don’t formally network, read business blogs, or market themselves and their cause.  Right now today, you are someone’s hero and that’s not only an amazing opportunity for you to make a sale but an even bigger opportunity for you to make a difference in a fellow human being.

Every day I’m going to try to be as gracious as I can, refuse to believe my own press (positive or negative) and realize that there is value in everyone.

So whether you are networking online or in person remember that people like to feel included, a part of things and valued.  Don’t act stuck-up because we’re not impressed with that.  Be sincere and humble and you’ll sell a whole lot more and create customers and friendships for a lifetime.



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